Rethink Your Thoughts: Are They Serving You?

Is This Thought Serving Me?

We each experience thousands of thoughts per day. Some pass through unnoticed, while others—especially those carrying an emotional charge—can feel like absolute truths. It can seem as though we are experiencing reality itself, rather than a viewpoint shaped by our mind.

A key aspect of the way I work is the understanding that thoughts and beliefs function more like pointers to reality rather than direct access to it. Reality itself is infinitely complex—far too vast for our minds to fully encapsulate. Instead, we rely on best guesses, summaries, and approximations. Imagine a thousand fingers all pointing toward the same thing from slightly different perspectives. No single perspective captures the entirety of what is happening, but together, they form a picture that helps us navigate the world.

For this reason, I encourage people to view their thoughts and beliefs as tools rather than as fixed representations of reality. When we adopt this mindset, we can optimize for functionality rather than getting stuck in an endless debate about truth.

A key question to ask yourself is: "Is this serving me?" Whether referring to a thought, feeling, or belief, this question shifts the focus from proving its truth to assessing its usefulness. When we make this small but crucial adjustment, we open up space to prioritize how a thought makes us feel and how it impacts our ability to act in any given situation.

Often, simply questioning a problematic thought in this way is enough to weaken its grip. If it’s not serving you, follow up with: "What might be a better fit right now?" See what new thoughts arise and then imagine trying them on, much like trying on a new coat or dress. Does this new thought feel useful? If you were to adopt it, might it help you move forward?

This approach doesn’t require force or struggle—just curiosity. By treating thoughts as flexible, functional tools rather than rigid truths, you give yourself permission to update and refine your inner narrative in a way that truly serves you.

If you would like help shifting your own thinking, I’d love to help.